Ready, set, update!

     Twice the itchiness, twice as early. Twice the nausea, twice the exhaustion, twice the "can do" attitude. See where I'm going with this? Twice the support system, twice the love, twice the efforts and trials. How many times can I say "twice" before it starts sounding weird...? :) 

     So here we go! I am ONLY 8 weeks and 6 days, but I am ONLY one appointment away from graduating from Fertility and Endocrines specialized care. So, this is still earlier than most pregnant women feel comfortable sharing- but c'mon, blog posts, Facebook updates, who am I am kidding- I like to share. (So for the person that sent me the text about not telling them...it's public knowledge, don't try to ruin my day!) So share, I shall! And I have pictures for you! 
I kept them to myself until we had made it a little further because, things happen, cells could quit growing(been there), and what if it didn't turn out the way I wanted it to? But also, what if I need people to know? What if I want to celebrate the good news? So here ya go! 

     Right now, WE'RE TALKING ABOUT TWINS HERE PEOPLE!!!!!!!!


     We are not shocked or surprised but we are thrilled. We chose to transfer two traditional IVF embryos on November 14th. We carefully assessed their grades and their qualities. They will be fraternal twins  as they each came from their own embryo. Technically, they got their start the same way Lucy did, at the same time- weird, right? 

It was the same cost (not that it should matter) to thaw two embryos and they both went in at the same time in the same catheter.
 I went in to the consult appointment ready to argue my points (in hopes of transferring two) with Dr. Krause because the first round of IVF, she was not so pro multiples... this time, she brought it up first! So of course we agreed! We know the risks, we understand what we are getting ourselves into... and as our friend Aaron put it, "With the third kid, we had to switch from man to man to zone defense." We're ready, well..... we're ready to try anyway! :) 
We had a clue that both embryos stuck at the first blood test, the pregenecy hormone called HCG was at 1267 and in two days the number is supposed to double. My HCG tested at 3315 the next blood draw. We were getting confident but still weren’t positive they would both continue growing. Then the ultrasounds, we could see heartbeats for both! Then at the most recent ultrasound, we watched them both squirm and swim around and wave their little limbs. So. Cool. 
    
     The only thing that I am taking two times as much is the folic acid, the rest of the medications stay the same. I am still doing progesterone shots, estrogen patches and other progesterone. Hoping at my next appointment, 10 weeks, that we are done with those things and just keeping up with vitamins! 

Day 5 Blastocysts Nov 14

Positive Pregnancy test after the two week wait. Nov 26

First ultrasound, Dec 10
6 weeks, 4 days

Second ultrasound, Dec 26
8 weeks 5 days

Otis is thinking PAWSITIVE (or dreaming)

 Christmas was totally awesome of course. I felt awful but look at this cool kid. We celebrated all day long with a nap in the middle. She loved visiting and playing as much as she loved the presents. 

Day after Christmas, cruising. 

If you didn't get to see my house all decorated for Christmas...sorry, it's alllllll put away!!! 

IVF is awesome- but also, let's be real...

     If you or anyone you know is faced with the decision of using IVF to grow their family, encourage them- and I'll encourage you- to do it! It is beautiful and all things awesome. It is mind-blowing to have science help your body make beautiful, brilliant babies. It's all things amazing!

Now, that you know how awesome IVF is, stop reading. Also, don't tell anyone that is considering IVF any of the information you are about to read....

     

     IVF is hard. And I'm not complaining, I know I am lucky. I am being real. I am also writing this to remind myself how tough this really is. It's not that I forgot from this summer or from 2015. It's just you don't remember the exact way it happens because you are so excited about the opportunity or the current successes. That is how it is most of the day right now too!

    

And then- its hard. So, if you didn't know, let me tell you a few real things about IVF. 

Gray hair is actually a common side effect. The mix of medications and hormones speed up that graying process. Of course, you want to be the best mom ever and so careful about everything you do- so there's no dying of any kind until everyone is in the clear. So these grays, they are sparkling proudly as holiday decorations in my hair. 

I itch. This is not a common symptom...I've asked and asked and asked. My skin is hyper sensitive. The lightest touch will set my skin on fire, itching and spreading. Spraying with lavender and peppermint dulls the heat, but it is intense. It is hives all day, and all over. My scalp even starts burning if I get warm or stressed- so yes, emotions help control the misery too. (I know, a small price to pay)

     Turns out, this round- I get queasy. Morning, afternoon, night, it doesn't seem to matter. If I don't have enough to eat or smell something unfavorable, all the icky feelings. Now, that may go hand in hand with any other pregnancy- I only have IVF pregnancies to compare. 

     A very IVF symptom or side effect is being so flubby. It's the hormones. I was feeling so good after losing 36 pounds, thats right, 36. Then I started shooting up progesterone and wearing estrogen patches. Then comes the other progesterone inserts. Geez- so much flub. The hormones cause you to retain fluids and just be so flubby. Thank goodness for the dress down days at school. 

Another reason to be thankful for the holiday theme dress down days- injection sight soreness. I cannot comfortably wear jeans or real pants right now. My backside right below my hips is constantly sore from the stabbing needles in my nightly routine. My skin is much less bruised this go around- there's a positive! But the soreness is worse. Sleeping always helps me find creative ways to miss laying on the sore spots. After three rounds of these shots and being totally tough, I actually cried Saturday night because it hurt so bad. This is hard. 

I also puked in the car Sunday, but why did I think sitting in the back seat was ever going to end well?? 

So I may have lost my mind, I definitely feel like a frumpy, gray haired, itchy, uncomfortable mess and I am just so tired. 

Here's the good news. I can be pretty easily distracted from all of that. Teaching does it for me. When I have 23 other bodies to keep safe and productive, I forget all about the unpleasantness. Or I scratch while directing them to the next activity. Lucy is pretty surefire distraction too. She keeps me busy with playdoh and Christmas town characters so that is doesn't matter how flubby I'm feeling, she's having fun and I forget to be mildly miserable. 

Life is good and I can handle it. But let's be real and admit that it's not all rainbows and butterflies. Thinking positive is the ONLY way to do this. So keep sending those positive vibes, I'll channel them into itch fighting vibes. :) 

6 Weeks 3 Days

That's right. Six weeks, three days on Monday. 

     It's the holiday season and we are celebrating the good times! When things are good, you celebrate and things are so good! 
     We went to our specialist on Monday for our first ultrasound and it was wonderful. Everything is measuring exactly as it should, we got to see a flickering heartbeat (although its too early to hear anything.) I am sticking to my routine of progesterone injections, estrogen patches and other progesterone... All the vitamins and all the supplements! We are continuing the routine because its working! 
     Part of the routine now is being tired, so tired. I will gladly be tired when I know the end result is completely worth it. Also...the hives...they're back. With Lucy, it was at ten weeks that I started itching for no reason and getting hives at the brush of any kind of touch. This time....it was five weeks! And man, I am itchy!! But again, no complaints! I will deal and smile! :) We will return to Fertility and Endocrine the day after Christmas to check again. We love all the updates and we remember all too well that we will graduate after ten weeks and move to a regular OBGYN. We want to hang out with Dr. Krause as long as possible!! 
So we are still cautiously optimistic that things will continue as they are, but we also understand that this is soooooo early! We understand that things could change, so we keep that in mind as we celebrate these good times! <3

A HUGE thank you to everyone who bought a t-shirt! We don't have any extras, which is awesome. We also were able to not only pay for the patches we continue to purchase ($200/every two weeks) but also the vials of progesterone ($50/each) and we will use any extra to get the progesterone suppositories ($92/box of 21- and I use 3 a day)- too much info, I know. Haha! But really, you all are amazing! The love is astounding and the support is indescribable!

     One more thing, Lucy has no idea. The word sister means nothing to her and she cannot understand babies that she does not see. We can't even tell her about the fun things we do until we are literally at the "surprise" and she discovers the activity is happening. She is two and she is literal. She has no concept of time and we are fine with that!! So she is on a need to know basis and right now, she doesn't need to know! All she needs to know is how loved she is and how fun the holidays are! :) <3